It’s a big day, full of questions and answers. You might even call it a financial day of reckoning, but if you do, please just think the words. Around here, we’re firm believers in the unholy jinx. Saying anything out loud, well, that’s just asking for trouble.
“Do you dress up when visiting an attorney?” Imaginary Keith wants to know. I see him looking into the closet, trying to decide what to wear.
“Sure, if you’re a show-off,” I tell him. “Dressing up always makes a person look like a show-off, unless of course you’re going to a masquerade party, or something like that. There are exceptions.”
I should point out that Imaginary Keith and I are also firm believers in the non-straight answer. Never answer a simple question with a simple answer. Never. We both read through the Bible once, and are confident that was the book’s central theme.
“Oh.”
Confusion, on the other hand, can often be expressed with merely a single syllable.
“I’m just wearing jeans,” I say. “But I’m bringing juggling balls, just in case.”
“Oh good. I like juggling. This might end up being fun after all. Who would have ever imagined that our financial da ---”
“Don’t say it.”