about • from the beginning •
login • register •

Archive

2008: Jan Feb Mar Apr May

2007: Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec

2006: Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec

2005: Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec

2004: Jan Feb Mar Apr May Jun Jul Aug Sep Oct Nov Dec

February 03, 2004

Each morning, without exception, the sole performer of the Coffee Urination Ballet Company dances madly up and down the hall of my office. It is my secret passion, this coffee ballet. I cannot seem to get enough.

This morning the ballet is in rare form. With each stunning pirouette, each grand jete to reach the toilet in time, and each plie to flush, the phone has rung with perfect synchronization. The toilet roars like an appreciative crowd, and the flush overpowers the ringing of the phone. Unbelievably, I have missed every single call all morning.

I cannot express how much this pleases me.

Even now, I brew yet another pot, in hopes of an afternoon encore.

That same ballet is performed regularly in my office by a much larger troupe of dancers.

Snowball on 02/03/04 at 02:43 PM

When it comes to working hours, I’ve danced alone for 15 years now. I’m afraid I wouldn’t remember how to share the stage.

Keith on 02/04/04 at 01:02 PM

In my office, the ballet is sometimes interrupted by the janitor who has closed the women’s restroom for cleaning. Then, the ballet suddenly turns into the tarentella.

on 02/04/04 at 06:24 PM

I must confess my ignorance of dance. When I read of your own office ballet turning into a tarentella, the only thing that came to mind was Tarantino, as in Quentin Tarantino.

What? I thought. The women’s bladders at Pam’s workplace are so sensitive that violence erupts because of a janitor in the wrong place at the wrong time? I know cubicle life can be rough, but this didn’t sound right at all.

But I have since educated myself, and I now have a very clear picture of the full-bladdered dancing women.

If your office should ever get a woman janitor, and she happens to be cleaning the men’s room, look for the dancing men. My guess is that it would be more of a Riverdance then tarentella. Men, you may well know, dance much more stiffly, and usually prefer keeping their arms still and at their sides.

Keith on 02/04/04 at 06:46 PM