Archives

Six days until the great novel writing kickoff.

I am without plot.  I am without character.

Yet it spite of my shortcomings, it seems I have been invited to a novel writing party, hosted by the local Nano group’s fearless leader.  She has promised snacks and door prizes, attempting to lure us in like a pack of wild ETs.  Or maybe I should practice our new collective nouns.  Give them a whirl.

A ward of writers.  A conflagration of writers.  Whatever.  That odd mix of humans in Meeting Room A with Doritos breath and sticky laptop keys.  You get the picture.

I may very well break the two year conversation embargo and attend.  Everyone in the forum keeps introducing themselves, some of them claiming how “old” they are.  One of them even confessed to their “oldness”, claiming the ancient age of 33 or 34.  I almost swallowed my tongue.  I may have to attend just to show them who the group’s real Rumplestiltskin is.

Who needs plot and character if you’re Rumplestiltskin?  Just lock me in a room with my laptop and I’ll try to spin a little gold.  Or at least eat all the Doritos.

If you’re like me, you have a hard time getting to sleep at night because you’ve never been able to accurately visualize a stack of one million pennies. 

Consider the problem solved, thanks to The MegaPenny Project.

Update

Wasting time wouldn’t be complete without Tourette Syndrome Barbie.

Or if you like the group Weezer, you might want to try your hand at a little Sumo wrestling, Weezer Style

The stars slowly align.  Just as I was about to announce that I am seriously considering participating in next month’s novel writing foolishness, NaNoWriMo, I get an email from the Salem, Oregon forum group leader.

It’s easy to see why this could be taken as a sign.

Participate . . . participate . . . participate . . . I can almost hear the groans of this inevitable universe, prodding me into my proper place like I’m some sort of child actor who keeps missing the big white X that has been taped onto my spot on the stage.

But my mind wanders.  And is it any wonder.  Stumble Upon is truly a fun way to waste time.  Thanks Catherine. 

Here’s a couple of last night’s distractions:

Weird and Wonderful Patents

http://www.albinoblacksheep.com/games/

Squares

Paper Toss

http://www.trashlog.org/

http://www.specialdefects.com/v2/

http://openinghooks.us/

Juggling Stickman

Leave It To Bush :: Featuring Two Ferrets and Gary Busey

Did anyone miss me?  Did anyone panic?  An attempt to upgrade my software and upload everything onto the server all by myself failed miserably.  I over-thought everything.  I reasoned my way into impossible corners, reading and re-reading the instructions so many times that I became positive that additional steps were required.  I added files that didn’t need adding and deleted files that didn’t need deleting.

But look!  We’re back in business thanks to those hardworking Expression Engine support people.  Who are these people anyway?  Do you think they wear capes as they type?  Do they ever sleep?

I must love the frustration of the do-it-yourself lifestyle.  Why else would I put myself through such torture.

Tomorrow morning I’m thinking of giving myself a checkup.  I mean, if I can stumble through this computer stuff, I’m almost positive I can do most of my own doctoring.  I picked up a Do-It-Yourself Colonoscopy Kit off of Ebay the other day.  Really cheap!  I couldn’t believe it.  I may just have to give it a whirl.